I’ve pretty much stopped taking friend requests from single men on Facebook. As a travel blogger and entrepreneur trying to grow my freelance writing business, it’s wise to increase my following on social media. So, generally I accept new friend requests unless the person looks like a total freak. However, lately I’ve been rethinking that strategy.
The Scenario
kissing in public
Nearly every day I’m bombarded with message requests from single guys immediately after accepting their friend request. It’s become such a problem that I’ve pretty much stopped accepting friend requests from single men because as soon as I do the private messages begin.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m open to a friendly chat now and then with someone new. I enjoy getting to know people from all around the world. But the intent of these messages isn’t subtle. They begin with something like, “Are you single?” or, “Hi Gorgeous.” Hand me a vomit bag!!
Profile Red Flags
Fake profile picture
Fortunately, I’ve been able to decipher the code by glancing at their profile. If they advertise that they are single in the “About” section of their profile, and then every photo of them is a selfie, they’re using Facebook as a dating app and I won’t accept their request. PLEASE stop using Facebook as a dating app! Use dating apps to troll for chicks, not Facebook!
Why do I use Facebook?
Many people have gotten so annoyed with all the social media bullshit that they’ve deleted their accounts. I’m not ready to go there. Like any tool, it’s how you use it that determines if it’s a positive or negative influence in your life. I use Facebook to stay in touch with friends and family, keep informed on current global events, and make new connections.
Finding Love on Facebook
Love
I’ve heard that some people have stumbled across a romantic relationship on Facebook, and that’s fantastic, but it wasn’t their intent. It’s not much different than meeting someone at the grocery store. You don’t walk through the grocery store hitting up every girl you see hoping she’ll go out with you. That’s creepy! It’s no different than Facebook. If you’re looking for someone to date go to the right place, or use an appropriate app, like Tinder or Match.
How I Handle it
I used to respond to these messages from guys because I didn’t want to be rude and I was naïve about their intent. Then, when I told them I wasn’t interested, they would get defensive or hostile. Now that I’ve seen a consistent pattern, I immediately block them without a single response. If they wanted something kind or helpful they would most likely say so right away. When the message begins with “Hey,” flattery, or something else vague, I know they’re just fishin’. Bah-bye.
If you’re a guy that’s been using Facebook as a dating app, please give it a rest. We know what you’re up to and we’re sick of it. Sign up for a Tinder account like everyone else and stop wasting our time and energy.